Walking in Peace through the Storms
There is something amazing about a great night's sleep. It is something most people take for granted, but it is something we should be very thankful for. It is a time for our physical body to rest and heal itself and for our minds to rest. But this is not always easy, so many things can upset and disturb a restful sleep - even being over tired can itself be a major problem.
I remember a time when I couldn't sleep because of pain, it was so difficult to get comfortable and the pain killers always seem to give me disturbing dreams. It seemed like a vicious circle - even the sleep I did manage to get wasn't restful. And emotional pain not only exhausted me mentally but was causing my body to tense up and cause even more health problems. My doctor one day did a simple little exercise with me - I had been attending the hospital and different doctor appointments, but nothing was working - no matter what they did or what medication they gave me nothing seemed to be working. But this one day my GP asked me if she could try something. I agreed, willing to try anything in my desperation. She asked me to just relax in my seat, close my eyes and take five deep breathes in and out. She then asked me to think of something that I do to relax or something that makes me happy. I did, I thought about playing my piano. Then she asked me "how did that make you feel" I answered "I don't know - I don't really feel anything". She smiled and with a friendly and comforting voice said "that's ok" she continued "now relax again, take another 5 deep breathes in and out" - she waited then softly said "now think of the last time you felt upset" I immediately felt my body go tense and felt that sick feeling hit my stomach like someone had just punched me. She then asked me "how do you feel now" - I couldn't answer - I just burst into tears - She said "is it sadness?" I nodded and felt like she had just hit the nail on the head. After I had settled she explained how people can get caught in emotions like sadness - and it is like a trap that holds you down drowning out and numbing the other emotions like happiness. She told me that I would have to let the events and feelings come to the surface and face them and acknowledge that they had happened but that these things cannot be undone, but that I cannot bury them or hide from them anymore. She explain how these things are exhausting and destroys the physical body. There are 2 different reactions to emotional pain - we either bury it so deep and refuse to think about it or talk about it but never deal with it OR the other way is to talk about it over and over - re-living the pain again and again. Both are very damaging to our well being. Both will keep us in a trap of sickness and weakness. I understood what she was saying to me because the verse in the bible came to me that said 'Renew your mind' It was like someone had switched a light on in the darkness of the sadness. For the next week I went each night to my room and closed the door - I asked the Holy Spirit to help me to find release from every fear and every hurt and every pain that was trapped deep in my heart. One by one, memories came to me, tears came but there was a peace that said - this did happen - but there is another way to look at it. One by one - the Holy Spirit helped me to see it from a different point of view and bit by bit I felt like burdens where being lifted. This is something that I do continually. I didn't go back to see my doctor until a year later when I decided to make an appointment just to tell her how good I had been doing.
I have learned from that time how important it is for us to enter each day free of the past and free from the fear of future, and how important it is to take everything to God in prayer.
There can be so many thoughts flying around in our minds and so many fears and hurts playing over and over again like a broken record that does nothing good but only seeks to exhaust us and distract us from living our lives. The Bible teaches us to take every thought captive and bring it into obedience to Christ. This is something that only the Holy Spirit can help us to do. You may feel that there are to many thoughts haunting you and you are beyond help, but I praise God, that it is never to late, God's Grace is enough for you. You may need prayer or counsel, but most of all you need to ask the Holy Spirit to help you.
God showed me this verse in Genesis 1v5 - And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and morning were the first day.
When I read it, it was like the words "the evening and morning were the first day" where jumping of the page - and I just thought - the evening came first -you see I always thought the morning came first then came the evening - but when I read this I could see - that my new day actually started the evening before. If we go to bed upset about something we will have a bad nights sleep and wake up feeling down before the day even begins. BUT when we go to bed giving all that troubles us over to God our Heavenly Father - thanking him for his grace and love - and praising Him for his goodness and faithfulness we can sleep in peace and awaken to the joy of a new day. Sometimes I will read or listen to some bible reading or teaching, sometimes I lay down on my bed and say I'm just gonna rest in your arms Lord and trust you. I am still growing and learning more of his amazing love and peace day by day. So I can tell you that even if you struggle to trust God completely now and haven't yet experienced that amazing peace - He loves you so much and wants to care for you and longs to carry you and for you to rest in his arms. He knows and understands everything that troubles our souls even when we don't know. Each evening if you will take time just to talk to him and pour your heart out to him - he will come gently and tenderly and begin a deep healing in your heart and body. The damage of years of pain can be healed and restored. Jesus is the Healer of the broken hearted and is always close to them. But we must call out to him and he is ready to answer you.
This song is called "Your Loving Kindness" and it is something that I remind myself often and meditate on. That God's loving Kindness and Tender mercies are new everyday. I aim to go to sleep with my Lord and Saviour on my mind and to awake to the joy of his presence in the morning - knowing that his Grace is enough for me - no matter what that day will hold. I now enjoy good restful sleep and my husband actually jokes with me about how much I sleep - but I just smile and say thank you Lord for giving me restful sleep.
To me this is what being a Christian is all about - knowing Jesus as your own personal Lord and Saviour. Not just about what other people see and think. Not just going to church etc.
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